QUESTION: My colleague is my best friend.
FACT: The test of friendship comes when one Is promoted over the other.
Most people see their workplace as an extension of their social circle. Indeed, some colleagues become best friends for life. However, such friendships can get broken—especially when two people have been equal in terms of skills and experience, but one moves up faster within a company’s hierarchy than the ,other. Its not a problem if one person has left the company for a higher post, but it becomes a problem if the person climbs the ladder in the same company while the other does not. And if not handled ‘properly, the friendship might be at risk.’
A broken friendship manifests itself in several ways. Friends might stop talking to each other, reduce the frequency of their interaction to a bare minimum, avoid meetings using lame excuses, etc. In the case of a broken friendship at the workplace, some might seek a transfer to another team, while a few others, in extreme cases, might leave the company itself. Some others take time off to reconcile with tile current status. It is not true that only the one who has been denied a rise in status gets miffed. Sometimes, such people show a high degree of maturity and continue with the friendship, but it might break down due to implicit or explicit statements from the other person who begins to show signs of superiority or pompousness. Actually, the responsibility should be more on the promoted person to act in a way that makes -his friend feel comfortable.
A trait of maturity is essential for maintaining a friendship. Even friends who break up can revive their relationship if they become mature individuals. But this rarely happens as, by the time they realize this, the chasm will have widened so much that it becomes difficult to fill it up,
A philosophical attitude too can help. One should understand that nothing is permanent in life. A person getting a promotion early might not gain in the long run. Another point against friends breaking up due to career reasons is that, a few years down the line, the two people might be ‘working in different companies and they could network and gain advantage from it. In this world of cut-throat competition, the bond of true friendship ought to be cherished since a friend will always be there for you as an anchor, helping and supporting you M all your endeavors.
WHAT CAN you Do? It is better that you keep professional and personal relationships separate. And if, for some reason, the two get mixed up, you should have the maturity not to let .career ups and downs affect your friendships. A friendship can be maintained only when two friends sort out things through transparent communication. One should avoid the approach that the other is at fault, and, instead, should take the first step towards rapprochement. This will hurt even more, as the other person too might be feeling the same. Taking the first step will help you in sorting out the issue at the earliest opportunity; the more you delay, the more difficult it gets to resolve. Yes. some break-ups can be permanent, but then you should learn a lesson from the experience. Eventually, nothing should really impact On your performance at work.
